


I Don't Feel So Good

by americanchemicals



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Heavy Angst, Other, POV Peter Parker, Precious Peter Parker, Protective Tony Stark, Spoilers, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 12:24:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14496921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/americanchemicals/pseuds/americanchemicals
Summary: not going to include a summary because I don't want to spoil IW for those who have yet to see it





	I Don't Feel So Good

It felt like all Peter ever did was want to impress Mr. Tony Stark. He had constantly been sticking out his neck and trying to do things for the man to see him as something other than a kid. Going after the Vulture, trying to help capture the man so others wouldn't have to. He wanted to be taken seriously as a hero, but he also desperately craved praise for his actions. 

Mr. Stark had asked Peter to join the Avengers. When he was on that bus and saw the alien space ship, he didn't even hesitate. He just wanted to be helpful, even if he had denied the offer. 

Even though Mr. Stark told him to go home, he couldn't. He was capable of doing more, and he wasn't going to leave his mentor all by himself. He could do something to help. 

And he did. The  _Aliens_ plan worked, and things were looking up for them. Honestly, for a second, a lot was going right. But, good things never seem to last. 

Fear. It was something that had been slowly consuming Peter throughout this entire ordeal, but in that moment it was suffocating him. He didn't know what was happening, what to do. This wasn't something he could fix.

It was like that time that he was drowning in that lake. The water filling his lungs, the burn of pain spreading throughout his chest and head. Only this time, he wasn't submerged with something physical, rather something abstract. It was almost like the tingling sensation that would spread throughout his nerves after a panic attack, his entire body feeling numb with an overload of the senses. It was a miracle that he hadn't died that night. If it wasn't for Mr. Stark, surely he wouldn't be in this predicament right now.

Thinking back on it, the older man had seemingly gotten him out of a lot of messy situations. It seemed like Peter had to be saved more often than he had done the saving, and it had crushed him when Stark had criticized him for failing. But, even with the critique, Stark had been there to fix everything.

And surely, his mentor could fix this. He had to. He was Tony Stark, there was nothing he couldn't do. 

It was probably why Peter admired him so much. After what happened with Uncle Ben... He didn't have a lot of people left in his life that he could lean on. Sure, Aunt May and Ned were with him through thick and thin, but he felt bad burdening them with his hero stuff on top of his regular life. Honestly, he needed Mr. Stark. It was why he had obsessively texted Happy for all those weeks, because he wanted nothing more than to spend more time with his own personal hero. 

As it started, whatever it was, as the other heroes around him started to crumble away into dust, Peter was terrified. He looked to Mr. Stark, the man surely would know how to fix this. And if didn't, he would figure it out. He  _had_ to. 

But then, Peter's stomach churned, and his vision became spotted and fuzzy, his head pounding.

"I don't feel so good." 

He spoke other things too, but his ears were ringing and he couldn't really hear his own voice. And he knew, was that he had to get to Tony. Tony would save him, as he always had. He would make everything okay again. He vaguely registered collapsing into the older man's arms, pressing into him close for comfort. 

Man, May was going to kill him. How long had he been in space at this point? He barely slept, and it was hard to tell the passing of time when there were no longer any clear nights or days. He hoped she was okay, that she wasn't worrying too much.

He hoped Ned wasn't too worried either. Both of them were supposed to study together for a math test later that day, and it probably wasn't reassuring when Peter didn't show after ditching him on the bus to go after an alien spaceship. 

Maybe they weren't missing him too much. He knew this probably wasn't true, but he was going to repeat it to himself in his head to help him feel better, even in the slightest. 

He realized now, that he had massively let down Mr. Stark. Sneaking after him into space, probably forcing the older man to have to keep an eye on him and distracting him from the task on hand, which was saving the effing universe. In the moment, he was probably being a huge burden, but he couldn't help it. He just let the guilt consume him.

He didn't know what was happening to him, but he knew he had the same fate of fading away. He cried out how he didn't want to go, as if the simple words could just reverse what Thanos had done. He was still young, he hadn't even graduated high school yet. He still had so many things that he wanted to do. It wasn't fair, he hadn't had anything to do with what happened to Thanos to cause him to be like this, and yet somehow him and so many other innocent people had to pay the price. He wondered how much pain the monster had caused to so many other innocents like him.

He apologized to Tony. For everything. He hoped it was enough. He wished he had more time, could say more. Thank his mentor for doing all that he had done, for helping him become a better hero and a better person. For so thoughtfully designing his suits. For being like a dad to him. But, there was never enough time. Because, it was time for Peter to go, despite how much he wished it wasn't.

And so, he crumbled away, into dust. Just like the others had. 

-

When Peter opened his eyes next, he didn't know where he was. 


End file.
